This is by far on one of my more personal sides of blogging. Rather than sharing basic information many can relate to, I will throw out personal information and hope that those who apply to the same situation as I can latch on to what I'm saying.
I started running to avoid stress and get rid of anger. Yes, I was technically running away from my problems. I never imagined myself being a competitive athlete in running or participating in sports or wearing a jersey with my school's name on it as I ran. But, here I am.
At first running was therapeutic. It was not addictive, did not stress me out, and was not a must do. If I had time here or there I would go for a run if there was nothing better to do and I was feeling up to it. My, have things changed.
Joining cross country my attitude towards running changed. I already had shin splints and was just dealing with the pain by ignoring it, as most runners do. But forget the injuries and pain that come with running. The psychological process of a runner seems to change along with the body. Becoming a competitive runner, the pressure more than tippled within a week. First, I was competing for myself and against myself, only to become better and actually enjoy a run. Once I joined a sport that all we do is run in, my mind completely skipped over the part about actually trying to enjoy running and trying to become the best as soon as I possibly could.
After being stuck with the temporary death sentence a runner could receive, injuries galore, the stress level of running became insane. At this point you are not only trying to stay in shape while not running, but keep your endurance up as well. Watching your team improve and improve is the most wonderful thing in the world, but it's also the hardest.
Imagine this scenario: you are trapped underground with ten other people. For days and days you work to dig yourselves out or find a way to escape. Somehow you manage to dig a tunnel together all the way out and finally you see daylight. Imagine all those people you were stuck with crawling through the tunnel, back to back, and each one making it out. But before you (the last one) can make it out, the tunnel you've created collapses, and you're by yourself. And you can see just a sliver of daylight yourself and you can see those people you were stuck with dancing about outside in the daylight through a tiny crack, but it's under a boulder and you can't move it yourself.
This is exactly what it is like to be injured to someone who cares about their team very much but cannot participate in the things they do.
Now imagine the people you were stuck with finally are able to pull that boulder away and you are free yourself! You jump and leap for joy with them and it feels as if nothing can stand in your way! Then you remember that you have nowhere to go. These people that you were stuck with now have jobs, homes, and families. Where do you go? You have a lot of catching up to do. That's a lot of pressure and stress, right?
This is how it feels to come back from an injury. Running definitely does mess with your brain if you allow yourself to become dedicated and committed to it while doing a competitive sport. Look for more posts to see my thoughts continued.
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